My wife hosted a dinner party for all our friends, some of
whom we hadn't seen for ages, and everyone was encouraged to
bring their children along as well.
All throughout dinner my wife's best friend's four-year-old
daughter stared at me as I sat opposite her. The girl could
hardly eat her food for staring.
I checked my shirt for spots, felt my face for food, and patted
my hair in place; but nothing stopped her from staring at me. I
tried my best to just ignore her, but finally it was too much
for me.
I asked her, "Why are you staring at me?"
Everyone at the table had noticed her behavior, and the table
went quiet, waiting for her response.
The little girl said, I’m just waiting to see how you drink like a fish.”
In Memoriam
With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the
moment,
it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person,
which almost went unnoticed last week. Larry LaPrise, the man who
wrote
"The Hokey Pokey", died peacefully at age 93.
The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the
coffin.
They put his left leg in. And then the trouble started.
It was raining hard and a big puddle had formed in
front of the little Irish pub.
An old man stood beside the puddle holding a stick
with a string on the end and jiggled it up and down in
the water.
A curious gentleman asked what he was doing.
‘Fishing,’ replied the old man.
Poor old fool thought the gentleman, so he invited
the old man to have a drink in the pub.
Feeling he should start some conversation while
they were sipping their whiskey, the gentleman
asked.
‘And how many have you caught today?’
‘You’re the eight.’
Mrs. Ravioli comes to visit her son Anthony for dinner. He lives
with a female roommate, Maria.
During the course of the meal, his mother couldn’t help but
notice how pretty Anthony’s roommate is.
Over the course of the evening while watching the two interact,
she started to wonder if there was more between Anthony and
his roommate than met the eye.
Reading his mom’s thoughts, Anthony volunteered, “I know
what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Maria and I are
just roommates.”
About a week later, Maria came to Anthony saying, “Ever since
your mother came to dinner, I’ve been unable to find the silver
sugar bowl.”
“You don’t suppose she took it, do you?”
“Well, I doubt it, but I’ll email her, just to be sure.”
So he sat won and wrote an email:
I’m not saying that you “did” take the sugar bowl from my house;
I’m not saying that you “did not” take it.
But the fact remains that is had been missing ever since you were
here for dinner.
Your Loving Son,
Anthony
Several days later, Anthony received a response email from is
Mama which read:
Dear son,
I’m not saying that you “do” sleep with Maria, and I’m not saying
that you “do not” sleep with her.
But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her OWN bed, she
would have found the sugar bowl by now.
Your loving Mama
